Good parenting is a hot topic that gets a lot of attention online these days. With the internet at our fingertips, everyone is looking for ways to be the best parent possible.
First, let me reassure you: no one is perfect, but you can be a wonderful parent. Avoid striving for perfection in yourself or your child because doing so will create unnecessary pressure and expectations. A child observes everything, and during the first seven years of life, their environment helps shape a large portion of their personality. Newborns have around 100 billion brain cells (neurons) with relatively few connections. These connections form, strengthen, and shape our thoughts, control our actions, shape our personalities, and ultimately define who we are. These connections are influenced by life experiences, forming constructive thoughts and behaviors. So, be mindful of your actions as a parent. (“Parenting Matters,” n.d.-a)
When broadly classifying fantastic ways of parenting, focus on the activities mentioned below: (“fantastic ways of parenting,” n.d.-c)
- Spending quality time with your kids
- Be a good role model
- Teach gratitude
- Praise your kids
- Teach your kids social skills
- Encourage physical activity
- Say ‘I love you’
1.1 How can you spend quality time with your kids?
Spending quality time with your kids is crucial for good parenting. Reading to them, conversing with them about your day, and then inquiring about theirs without passing judgment creates a secure environment. Taking walks with them, dancing to music, attending sports events, and engaging in other activities together are examples. Find activities that everyone finds interesting. Personalize what “family time” means to you. A child’s assurance that their caregiver will satisfy their needs defines attachment security, a crucial aspect of development. In contrast, young children who cannot form a secure attachment to a primary caregiver (due to abuse or separation, for example) may exhibit insecure behaviors and face other negative consequences throughout their lives, such as mental health disorders and disruptions in social and emotional domains. (Gadsden et al., 2016)
Figure 1-1: Human brain development: rate of synapse formation by age
SOURCE: (2) (“Nelson2000,” n.d.-b)
1.2 Why are parents constantly encouraged to have conversations with their kids?
Having conversations with your kids is a key aspect of positive parenting. Talking to your child while they are still a newborn or infant fosters familiarity and comfort, aiding nursing and fostering an emotional bond. If your child is a toddler or preschooler, talking to them daily and spending time with them builds a better relationship. They listen to you better because they know how to express their needs and feelings and understand you as parents better, preventing the need for harsh discipline. (“How to be a good parent,” n.d.-e)
A crucial lesson from best parenting books is that you should never strike your kids. Harsh reprimands won’t improve your child’s behavior. Instead, become a more compassionate parent who can communicate with them and foster understanding. Giving your child love or affection won’t spoil them. Spoiling usually results from giving materialistic items, being overly tolerant, and not setting standards. (“10 commandments of good parenting,” n.d.-f)
1.3 How will you become a role model for your kids?
Being a role model is a cornerstone of positive parenting. Show them resilience by talking about tough situations you’ve overcome with effort. For example, I had a meeting today and was running late. Midway through the drive to the office, I realized I left my laptop at home. I couldn’t come back home! So, I asked your mother to email it to my coworker. Phew! Quick thinking saved me today.
Doing fun activities together is another way to be a role model:
- Build a nice doghouse for your dog or a birdhouse for migratory birds.
- Donate to charity occasionally.
- Bake cakes together or engage in tasks related to cooking, gaming, or journaling.
- Participate in activities that work as moral boosters.
Gentle parenting also suggests that maintaining a good relationship with the other parent and managing your stress level are two of the best predictors of good outcomes with children.
Teaching your kids gratitude is another important aspect of positive parenting. It helps them complain less and be more satisfied with their lives. Practices for expressing gratitude include praying in the morning and before bed, praying before meals, and praising the little efforts that friends and family make for them. Praise your kids as much as you can. It’ll help them strive for better. If your child picked up their toys by themselves today, let them play for 30 more minutes with their friends. If they did well in a test, give them their favorite snack. (“Kids health,” n.d.-i)
Avoid creating habits where your child becomes addicted to technology. Some parents use phones or TVs as distractions to make feeding easier for infants and toddlers. Instead, take them to the kitchen while you prepare meals. Make your child sit with you and observe while you eat. This will help them develop positive emotions toward food. (“UNICEF,” 6 ways to set your child on the path to a lifetime of positive habits, n.d.-j)
Although the relationship between media use and childhood obesity is challenging to disentangle, studies have found that children who spend more time with media are more likely to be overweight. (Bickham et al., 2013; Institute of Medicine, 2011; Kaiser Family Foundation, 2004). (Gadsden et al. (2016)
In the case of preschoolers, children, and adolescents, it is necessary to limit screen time, encourage outdoor play, and develop social skills. If you don’t live in a neighborhood with many kids, enroll your child in a sports academy. Swimming, basketball, badminton, cricket, or athletics can all lead to physical activity, releasing endorphins, keeping the body healthy, and developing confidence and high self-esteem. Exercise leads to better focus, quick and sensible patterns, and increases self-regulation skills and brain power. (“10 REASONS WHY CHILDREN SHOULD EXERCISE,” n.d.-k)
Don’t forget to say, “I love you.” Expressing your feelings teaches your children to do the same. Remind them that you are always a safe place for them to share their ideas.
Parenting tips can also be found in various best parenting books, providing extensive advice for new parents. These resources can help develop your parenting skills and guide you through parenting classes. Embracing gentle parenting can create a more harmonious home environment.
Additional Tips for Good Parenting
To further enhance your good parenting journey, consider these additional tips:
- Consistency: Maintain consistency in your rules and routines. This helps children understand expectations and develop a sense of security.
- Active Listening: Practice active listening by giving your child your full attention when they speak. This builds trust and encourages open communication.
- Empathy: Show empathy by understanding and validating your child’s feelings. This fosters emotional intelligence and strengthens your bond.
- Encouragement: Encourage your child’s interests and passions. Supporting their hobbies and talents boosts their confidence and self-esteem.
- Patience: Patience is key in good parenting. Understand that children make mistakes and need time to learn and grow.
By integrating these practices into your daily routine, you can create a nurturing and supportive environment that promotes your child’s overall well-being.
By focusing on these good parenting practices and continuously striving to improve your parenting skills, you can create a positive and nurturing environment for your children. Remember, good parenting is a journey, and every step you take makes a significant difference in your child’s life.
